So, this just happened...
We just had a fella of the drunken sort wandering around our parking lot. He was there when I left my office to head out for a meeting. He was there when I came back, except this time, his pants were falling around his ankles and his greasy boxers were in full view to the world. I ran into the building and told the receptionist to watch out for him, and promptly ran up to my office to get back...
thetalkinghead: The Talking Heads - Wild Wild...
2010, it'll be great to meet you...
I don’t do resolutions, in general. They’re just recipes for self-disappointment. However, I’d like to give some easy ones a try this year, just so I can see if they’re accomplishable. Here goes nothing… I need to listen to more Neko Case, Dirty Projectors, jazz of the cool variety, and TV on the Radio. I’ve been stuck in my own musical box lately and...
Am I really that old and out of touch?
Seriously, is it just me, or is there way too much sloppiness and camel toe promoted on the American Apparel website? I just looked on there and was beyond turned off by almost everything I saw. Ugh. I suppose I probably am old and out of touch.
The mortgage process is going to kill me.
Seriously, what a fucking hassle.
lumos-maxima: The Stooges - I Wanna Be Your...
10 Words You Need to Stop Misspelling →
reyno: This is educational and entertaining. It’s edutainment! brighteryellow:kayrutledge:toobadvampire This totally made my day, and I may just buy the poster to hang in my office.
Christian conservative television viewers can eat...
Me: This is [CaptainBigBoobs] speaking.
Viewer: YOU PEOPLE ought to be ashamed of yourselves.
Me: Is that so?
Viewer: Yeah. Putting filth like that American Family on the air.
Viewer: It's disgusting.
Me: Do you mean the insurance company?
Viewer: NO, I mean the show. The one with that horrible jerk from Al Bundy.
Me: "The one with that horrible jerk from Al Bundy?"
Viewer: Yeah, and Peg.
Me: Do you mean "Married with Children"? That show's been out of production and in syndication for many years now, ma'am. And we don't air the syndicated show.
Viewer: No, the new one. Golly, you people don't listen at all.
Me: No, you see, I am listening. You're giving me bits of information and expecting me to piece them together magically. Now what exactly do you have a problem with? What time does it air?
Viewer: "American Family".
Me: There's no show in existence on network television called "American Family", ma'am.
Viewer: Yes! And it's loaded with fags.
Me: Okay, I'm not even going to tolerate this language. Are you for real? Oh wait--do you mean "Modern Family"?
Viewer: Whatever it is, yes, it's loaded with gays and sex and it's unacceptable for the dinner hour.
Me: Well, I only have two things to say to you about that. #1, that's on my competitor's station. You called the wrong TV station. Congratulations there. And #2, you have control over what shows on your TV screen. You don't like gay people? Fine. Shut the show off. Turn the channel. Or call the network. But the local affiliate is obligated to air what the network sends them, regardless of the bigotry of its audience.
Viewer: *dial tone*
Only in my town...and maybe in the deep south,...
I just came back from a trip to pick up my lunch. On the way back, I followed a pick-up truck that had A DEAD FUCKING SQUIRREL HANGING FROM THE REAR BUMPER. The driver/owner obviously attached it there to be funny or cute. I had a hard time not barfing down the inside of my sweater as I drove. Goddamned rednecks.
Well now, that was all right, after all...
Hey now, here’s the year in review for me. I’ll make it brief. Job security issued created major anxiety. I know I’m not alone there, and the solidarity made it easier. Still broke. Still tired of it. Started the mortgage process. Got stalled by the housing bubble issue. Have begun it again now. My sister gave birth to my nephew. I got to be involved. It was the...
lumos-maxima: Jackson 5 - ABC Get your happy...
Thinking about what the last year and the last decade has meant for American...– Beauty Standards, Feministing (via strictlyfeminism)
Oh my god...
…my body is completely filled with unrealized farts today. I feel like a blimp. I wonder if my coworkers would think it was weird if I locked my office door and started doing yoga to push these farts out? (The answer is YES. YES THEY WOULD.)